Monday, June 30, 2008

Happy Anniversary Dr.s Mario!

I love you both tons! Congrats on the house and ps this is you in about 30 years! Hopefully DM won't really be into haggis but there's always the Juice Tiger! ;)

What Exactly Does @#!$%* Mean?

All of the linkies were contaminated! Dirty @#$%*s! Oddly though, when I typed the symbolage I was not thinking mild expletive or even a harsh one. I thought to myself..."Get BENT Mr. Haha". You dirty rat you ruined my links and all I can do is sit here and take it... Could somebody tell me what we call that again? Apparently the links are the only thing that need sterilization!

Actually the only thing I could really think of was "What a crock!"

No One Messes With The Babysitter!

Who can tell me what that's from?

So with slapping all my links into a post, blogger decided it would be funny to do a little "azzadd-on" of it's own invalidating the links...

You suck!

It's About Time!

I'm restructuring my blog a little here and there. Not that most people are here for the links, which is why I have decided to clean up the side bar. Is it a total blog faux pas to narrate this kind of thing?

That being said if you are actually looking for something try out the links along the bottom...if it doesn't work, let me know.


Reading I Enjoy

Mental Stimulus aka Good Reads

The Best Books
Webster Ain’t Got Nothing On These Guys!
My Favorite Part of the Desk Reference Set

I Love Me Some Good Fiction!
Twilight Series
Fan Fiction…The Good Parts
Creed Thoughts
Fiction Friday

Who Knew I Could Enjoy Non-Fiction So Much?
I’ve never laughed so hard over a story in my life!
More Laughing…A Few Tears
Special Ocassion Laughs
Part I Laughter
Part II More Laughter
Funny Story
Part I of a Great Two Parter
Part II

Free Entertainment

This is mostly links to TV shows, game sites, and some of the literary gems I have uncovered across Teh Internets.

*****UPDATE***** The "literary gems" deserve their own supports better linkage

Although sadly some of these shows were cancelled, but I'll update them as I find out...

Bionic Woman
YooToob Goodness

Games, Tools, Tips, Etc.
Building the Frankenstein of Blogs
Deep Thoughts
Lego Madness!
The Church Lady
Baseball on the South Pole
Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Not So Much A Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini

Because I'm Too Lazy To Check A Blog Reader

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Makeover Time!

OK so one of my very dear friends is getting married in about a month. After a conversation with my mother this morning on the way to work, it was decided I need a make over. There are several things that she mentioned and was pretty adament about me doing, ie hair removal, new clothes, make-up. The truly funny part is that MW informed me yesterday that she would be setting me up on blind dates. I laughed... and laughed harder when I thought about it later when I was alone.

She is very nice and helps me out a lot, but I couldn't help but feel a little like singing "...matchmaker matchmaker make me a match..." however having the robin williams version so engrained in my brain as opposed to the fiddler version, I immediately thought of this scene from Mrs. Doubtfire. This was the only one I could find with the whole segment it starts at 1:06 and goes to about 4:45. Enjoy!

I Love To Laugh

Wow Doc, This is Heavy!

Why is it that when I write about something serious and weighty I feel guilty about it? Like I'm ruining someone else's good time?

Yes I like to laugh, but there are some times where things just aren't funny.

I love to laugh! and with that in mind...

Teh News?

I'll be the first to admit that I am completely appalled by topics such as this. The mere mention of such things turns my stomach and I have to excuse myself from the situation.

I have a very strong emotional reaction to such things. Not that I've had the misfortune to experience such heinous violations, but none the less it still induces physical illness in me. Anyway I'm getting off track here.

What is cruel and unusual? Life without parole or having to live through a horribly traumatic experience that you truly never fully recover from, and most likely will be haunted by the memory of for the rest of your life?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Out Of Office version 2.1: This Saddens Me...

This was the second thread of the's a wonder we get any work done around here! Is it just me or does J Green remind you of this guy? Again bottom up.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 3:54 PM>>>
take em you gots to take em to learn me skills.

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 3:40:42 PM >>>

>>> Eva Longoria 6/24/2008 3:40 PM >>>
So now a days they call it saving souls.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 3:39 PM >>>
well, you'll have to give me some money too... and I'm not really spending any money to gamble.. I'm already going to Save souls in Vegas, so I'm already doing something Good for the world.... Indonesia will be another project and all of you can donate your Lunch every other week.

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 >>>
yeah or sell them your chilis gift card for 10 bucks.

>>> Eva Longoria 6/24/2008 3:33 PM >>>
I have an idea. Instead of you spending money on your trip to Vegas send them that money for food.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 3:18 PM >>>
yeah, well that is the way it is my friend. This Country even the poor beggars get a better break than these poor children.

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 3:16:25 PM >>>
i don't even think apples grow around here.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 3:11 PM >>>
but we have more than they do in this Country... and we are blessed for living in a Country still Free.

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 3:07:50 PM >>>
or walking down the street w/ a bucket, rags, lawnmower, weedeater and rake.
yes, I feel bad for all the kids around the country but we did what we had to survive we also had to lie to my mom about how much money we made that day. :o(

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 3:06 PM >>>
I know you did, but in Indonesia no one has shiny shoes, or shoes for that matter to be shined... and I am sure they have no apples, but there is a lot of slave trade.

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 3:02:47 PM >>>
why isn't the 11 year old working? like shining shoes or picking apples? that's what i did when i was 11.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 2:56 PM >>>
Hard times force parents to send eldest son to orphanageStory Highlights
Mother of three insists she is not "throwing away" her first-born child
Parents take 11-year-old to orphanage because they say they can't make ends meet
More than 80 percent in orphanages have two living parents, Indonesian study says

Out Of Office: Chili's $25 Gift Card!!! Who Wants It?

Yesterday was my day off, and this is what I missed. Sorry you'll have to start at the bottom and work your way back up...

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 1:30 PM >>>

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 1:29:15 PM >>>

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 1:27 PM >>>
ok $13 dollas right now!!!

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 1:26 PM >>>

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 1:16:17 PM >>>

>>> Eva Longoria 6/24/2008 1:09:19 PM >>>
How much do you want for the kangaroo?

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 1:07 PM >>>
I'm willing to take your $20 bucks... anyways, I just finished seeing Chili's menu and I'd like to back out on the deal.. I'm going to chili's for lunch!!!!

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 1:06 PM >>>

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 1:04:40 PM >>>

>>> Eva Longoria 6/24/2008 1:03:59 PM >>>
Ok. I'll give you $100.00, I go crazy for food.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 1:02 PM >>>
hahahahhahahaha, ok this is what you're missing!!!!

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 12:56:31 PM >>>

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:54 PM >>>
you lose!!!!!!!

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 12:51:25 PM >>>
i win?

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:50 PM >>>
you had me at "hello"

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 12:47:57 PM >>>
I'll trade you for a really nice stapler, a dunder mifflin snow globe, and the June 22nd Dilbert comic.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:45 PM >>>
just give me the money already!! sheesh!!!

>>> Little Hero 6/24/2008 12:44:11 PM >>>

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 12:43 PM >>>

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:42 PM >>>
let's do it!!! And continue bidding for it, because I need cash my friends for me roadtrip to Las Vegas!!

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 12:39:56 PM >>>
Fine I'll give you $30.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:39 PM >>>
fir free? YEeah!!! I'll take that and add it to my Chili's offer!!

>>> J Green 6/24/2008 12:36:05 PM >>>
15 smartbucks are yours.

>>> John Paul 6/24/2008 12:34 PM >>>
I am giving it away for $15, count them, 15 buckaroos... anyone down?

Friday, June 20, 2008

I am stunned! Just stunned. Stunned is what I am.

If I had any doubts about who to vote for, that decision has now been made for me. While reading this article I had some very vivid images of what this could be likened unto!

Think the child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang with sweet offerings of lollipops and treacle tarts. Yeah we all know where that ended!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Back to the Future or Numero Uno!

Today is a landmark.

The day I opened for business on this grand invention of Father Al's: Teh Internets. Translation: My blog was founded one year ago.

Picture it! 2007!

It was a warm June day, but you couldn't tell it from the thermostat setting.

I was wearing--

never mind what I was wearing. In my daily correspondence con GM she asked if I was busy. She told me to read this.

I didn't get drawn in right away, but I did peruse a little here and there.

Fast forward a few weeks and my sister sent me a link to the infamous post.

From there I was pretty much hooked. It's been an interesting year with blogging and discovering uncharted territory. I've had some bizarre themes that I've been through including blogging about my mid-afternoon sweet tooth,

and the hopscotch down memory lane leading up to my birthday.

But let's face it, who could forget David Bowie in a codpiece?

I can't really say that I've grown a lot or learned a lot except that the best way to tell a story is with visual aids. I can't even say that I've shared things of a truly profound nature. I have however read about many incidences where my fellow bloggy friends did made it through such things as this and that is why I keep coming back. Thank you for sharing your stories!

PS I still have something of a blogging inferiority complex.

What's Next?

After reading about this, I'm not even sure I want to know any more.

Monday, June 16, 2008


So this morning I was five minutes early in to work. haha

It actually is quite the feat since I have to be here at 6 am. That is correct I rolled in the door at 5:55 am. That's disgusting. But hey it makes me happy. Mostly because when I am the first one in in the mornings I enjoy the quiet solitude and the fact that the lights aren't on yet, so the only light is the sun in the window.

In five minutes time I was able to get to my Monday morning assignments quite quickly and actually they were out to print before anyone else on my team showed up. Woohoo!

I like my coworkers, but I also prefer to have quiet time. Go figure.

In Other News...

I only used a half a tank of gas last week! This includes four round trips to work, saturday errands, church, and even a little random running around. To celebrate...I am filling up my tank this afternoon... I must be glutton for punishment...*knock on wood*

Too late, I already need a new headgasket. I am accepting donations.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

****BREAKING NEWS!!!*****

Police find pipe bomb stuffed inside chicken
Device was large enough to harm a person if it went off, Conn. cops say
The Associated Press
updated 6:05 a.m. MT, Tues., June. 10, 2008
SIMSBURY, Conn. - Authorities in Connecticut are wondering who stuffed a raw roasting chicken with a pipe bomb and left it on a roadside.

Simsbury police Capt. Matthew Catania says a motorist noticed the chicken Monday morning. He says the bomb was large enough to harm a person if it went off.

The road was closed while the Hartford Police Department's bomb squad came and blew up the chicken. I want this job

Nobody was injured. No arrests had been made Monday night.

Battle of the Bands!

By a show of hands how many of you have played Guit@r H3ro?


Now how many of you have played R0ck B@nd?


Now how many of you have played both?

Which do you like better and why?

Do you ever find yourself humming these songs to yourself while you "strum/drum/sing" in your mind?

Do you hear songs on the radio and the only reason they are familiar to you is because you've played them on the games?


Monday, June 9, 2008

I Forgot...

Last Friday at work for insurance reductions we have fitness testing a yearly torture butt kicking assessment involving full sit-ups, push-ups, and wall sit, and among other things a blood test.

Not wanting to have to wait all day until I could eat something I scheduled my appointment for the earliest slot available on the last day, when I knew I wouldn't be as busy.

Since it was first thing, I went dressed for the ocassion.

I had packed a bag with clothes to change into after the glorified "you're too fat for the sidewalk" ordeal was over.

I knew I wasn't as healthy as last year, but it's amazing what you can will yourself to do.

For example, when I was in my Freshman year in college I was probably at one of my most out of shape and unhealthy weights I still managed to climb Table Rock in the Tetons. I think I take after my Grandma in that rite. Meaning the I'll do whatever I want and don't tell me differently.

But I digress.

After it was over and I was looking forward to changing out of my gym clothes, I realized to my horror that I forgot to pack a brassiere.

SO off to the closest store to obtain the necessary evil. When I first walked in I saw this

and it made me smile right back!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Serves You Right...Hooligans

This was too funny not to share. Hope you enjoy.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Seen & Heard

Oh yes and before I forget...
Yesterday on my flight out of Dallas our flight attendant stewardess, was introducing Oh Captain My Captain which is fairly typical.

"Your Captain today is Chuck Norris....Junior."

He must be a really kick A$$ pilot if he can claim that!

New & Interesting Developments

I am starting up my own business! Yes that's right. While I'm still figuring out a few things, hopefully this won't end up as successful as the long term of the dot-com-er's boom of the late 90s early 00s.

Updated to add that I seriously have no clue what I'm going to do with this business of mine, but I do know this: "This is the life we'veI've chosen." I'm sure I'll figure it out, but for now just call me Odd Job. And NO that does not mean you can call me OJ, my leather gloves actually fit and have fur on the cuffs.

Maybe I should start charging people for answers when they ask me questions...that's one way to make a buck, and you can rest assured that I won't be passing that one along ;)

60 Days...

and counting! I am so very excited for Squeal Fest '08. Yes, I'm slow. The first chapter was released on the 31st. I could barely contain myself for all of the giddiness and bouncing up and down in my chair. If someone had seen me while I was reading they would have thought I was having some type of fit.

I'm such a spazz.

Couple that with a hopeless romantic and...____________(Insert your own witty repartee here).

I really have no end to that opening statement.